It’s Friday, and there’s no better way to start the weekend than a night on the tiles with all your girls. You all get glammed up to the high heavens with your make up on, tan done, hair curled and your outfit is on fleek. What could possibly go wrong? You look fabulous! Think again love. Come 3am, this is what happens to every woman who decides that a Friday night out is a good idea!
1. That tan you so carefully put on or got professionally done? It’s either gone or smudged as many, many people have spilled their drinks down your arm or you have drooled on yourself and now your chest looks like the Niagra falls. Also, it is Ireland that we live in so your perfect pins are now streaming with rain-soaked orange liquid. Not so hot.
2. The MAC fake eye lashes that you so carefully put on just a few hours ago are now either gone or one is half way down your face and looks like a spider. I honestly don’t know which look is scarier!
3. The morning after the night before, when you’re in a daze about what actually happened to you. You seem to be fine, a slight headache but nothing major. But then you get out of bed and you’re cut and bruised. This happens to every woman on a night out as they try to walk in high heels and ultimately fail after three vodka Red Bull’s. Damn the cobble stoned paths of Temple Bar.
4. There is also the club stamp that you cannot get off your wrist, even if you try use bleach to remove it. That baby is staying there for everyone to see the next day. It also ends up looking like a big black dirty smudge which doesn’t sit well in the lecture halls on a Monday morning. Coppers why do you do this to me?
5. That River Island top you spent your hard-earned cash on? Ripped. The Topshop jeans you begged your mam to get? Torn. The outfit all your friends envied is now fit for the bin.
6. The Chanel perfume you spent 99 Euro on is completely gone to waste as you now either smell like booze or your best friends cigarettes. Not so glam.
7. You went out with your tights in pristine order and now they have a million and one ladders and holes in them. You would take them off but you didn’t shave your legs. Ooops.
8. The manicure you paid 20 quid to get in the local salon might as well have been done by your 6 year old cousin. One word: chipped.
9. You will lose one earring. Without a doubt. Always happens.
10. On a really bad night, you will lose your shoes in the club and try walk down Grafton street without them, only to find a homeless man trying to sell them. Believe me, it happens.
11. Your curly blow-dry is now a curly mess. It is going to take you three hours and one full bottle of conditioner to get the tangles out!
12. Two words. THE FEAR.
13. But want to know what the worst thing is? All of these lovely mishaps will be captured on someone’s iPhone and put up on Facebook the next day. Be ready for a whole morning of un-tagging.
Does anything good come from a night out? Of course it does. Because the nights out you have in college will be the best nights out you will ever have in your life. So embrace the bruises and messy hair, you won’t regret any of it.
Written by Olivia Hayes