The award-winning BBC documentary series Plantet Earth has a new presenter. It has been announced that it will be presented by none other than Ireland’s favourite documentary host, Hector!
The announcement came earlier this morning when it was announced that ole David Attenborough needs to take a little break.
Filming recently wrapped up on this new season of the show and some clips have leaked onto the internet. We can’t show them due to copyright infringement but allow us to recite some of the… interesting content from it.
One seen shows Hector emerging from the bushes, his fiery red hair beaming in the sun. “Rahoo! Rahoo!”, he shouts. “Howya, I’m Hector. Welcome to our little safari tour. Today I’m going to be nipping on down to this oasis to have a look at these hippos. C’mon!”.
Hector jumps and bounces along the sand towards the oasis that is surrounded by hippos both in the water. Hector sneaks up to one of the hippos and turns to the camera. “These boys are having a hard time out here in the blistering heat. Sure it’s a hard ole life being a hippo isn’t it?”. Hector then proceeds to climb up on a hippo’s back and starts jumping while shouting, “Rahoo! Rahoo! Get up out of that sleep, ya lazy git! You’ve had enough sleep!”. The hippo wakes up, rolls over and knocks Hector over. The camera cuts to the next scene.
“Rahoo! Rahoo! We’re back. Today I’ll be visiting the lions. These lads look pure starving. I’ll nip on down to them to see how they’re getting on”. Hector sneaks up to the lions. When he arrives at the pack he jumps to his feet. “Rahoo! Howyas lads. Jaysus, look at the size of them claws! You could rip a lad in half with those. Jaysus you boys look awful hungry”.
The footage cuts here. It is unknown when the new series of Planet Earth featuring Hector will be released. All we know for now is that it’ll be out soon.
Ok, none of this may have actually happened. It’s the work of our in-house Gas Cuntist at Oxygen.ie’s satire magazine, The Spanner. Thanks for reading and be sure follow us on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram for more laughs like this.