With Freshers’ Week now a distant memory, at least if you are able to remember any of it, here are some of the thoughts that no doubt raced through your brain-box at some stage:
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Okay, I’m here now, my parents are gone, I’m free like a bird, let’s go enjoy not having a curfew!
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This campus is way too big. It has four lakes, a forest, a castle, supermarkets, a Starbucks, a Subway, a local parish, endless fields of green and a small hobbit village. I feel like I’ve entered Narnia. Why did I ever leave home? I want to go back home! Mum?!
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I don’t know anyone. I will become some sort of creep that collects the hairs of his flat mates; gives them individual names and talks to them at night. Or I will die alone and devoured by spiders. The only way to identify me will be by the dry tears on my face. Tears I shed for the death of my social life.
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Oh, free tea!
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Why does food cost money? Is it acceptable to eat frozen pizzas from Tesco 7 days a week?
This wild bear has the right idea, scavenging from dumpsters should be far more socially acceptable.
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Where the hell is that building? What does J27 mean? Is this some code I can’t break because I’m not worthy of this college? Am I even capable of completing a degree? How does everyone know where to go? Am I even an intelligent being?
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Oh more free tea!
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Socials… that sounds nice! Let’s be social! I’d join the Harry Potter Society but that guy with a bolt tattooed on his forehead makes me think I’m not committed enough. Oh god the Christian Society have free pizza! Does it matter that I’m not Christian? Is it rude to just go eat the pizza?
Sign me up for as much free holy pizza as I can eat Mr. ex-Pope.
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I can see some people. They look confused too. Maybe I should introduce myself. Hi, I’m confused and lonely as well, let’s be friends, cool!
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So this is what a night out as an adult is like. Maybe this college thing is not so bad after all. I can do this, I can drink. Sure I’ll do shots, Mary! What could go wrong?
Cristina Florescu