As a species, humans are ridiculously flawed. We are without a doubt the most irritating thing on this planet! So what are the really annoying things we humans love to do- excluding the big-hitters such as genocide, slavery, murder etc.
1) Walk Super Slow In Front Of Someone:
Rather than having these as street signs, offending pedestrians should have to wear them as a badge of their own incompetence.
I am always in a rush; whether I am late, cold or just want to get something over and done with. The most irritating thing about this is that you always seem to get stuck behind someone crawling at a snail’s pace. To be honest, there is usually a group of slow walkers blocking the whole footpath so there is no way you can overtake. Clearly these slow walkers travel in packs so beware. You will spend the entire walk swerving in and out in the attempt to pass them whilst also attempting not to be trampled by the people walking in the opposite direction. So if you are a slow walker please walk to one side in single file so I can go about my business, thank you.
2) Putting Your Bag On A Seat When The Bus Is Full:
Unless there’s a baby in that bag, that is in no way a person and it can hoick itself onto the floor pronto.
If the bus is empty I have no problem with people taking up as much room as possible. You do you. BUT if the bus is full and people are looking around wildly to get a seat, put your bag down. It does not need a seat, it has not been walking around all day! If you don’t want to get your brand new designer bag dirty, put it on your lap. Just give up the seat before we all riot.
3) The Car Behind You Beeping As Soon As The Light Turns Green:
They come at you all aggressive, bust out yo’ Driving Mallet. Available from all good retailers.
Alright Vin Diesel, calm down, you’ll get where you’re going. I clearly do not have the lightening speed reflexes of the speed demon behind me, but I will get going when I do. It gets worse when they flash their lights or even over take you later on down the road. First of all for new drivers doing any of this makes everything worse as they panic. It also paints you in a very negative light. But clearly you gotta go where you gotta go. Just tone down the road rage like a thousand per cent. Thanks.
4) When Customers Blame You For Something Out Of Your Control:
“Why are these biscuits called ‘Kozy Shack’!? Why do my biscuits sound like a euphemism for a brothel!?
Ah, yes working in retail. It warms my heart to see the kindness and good in society. And then we have people who shout at you because you don’t stock an item you’ve never stocked. But they were here last week and they definitely bought it in the shop you work in. No matter how many times you assure them they did not, they ignore you. Sometimes the manager is called in to these issues. It’s always fun, especially when they threaten to get you fired.
5) When You Type The Amount Into The Till And They Pull Out A Wad Of Change:
If I see you even reaching for your coin purse, I’ma cause a ruckus up in here.
Maths has never been my strong point, so when the till can calculate the change it’s amazing. Until the customer decides to give you change after the till has calculated what you should give back. Now I have no issue if they give you the exact change, for example if it’s €4.15 and they give you €10.15. I can figure that out. However, when they throw a random 68c to you it’s time to panic. Any brain cells I may have run away and I’m left staring blankly between the customer and the change in my hand. Please, spare a thought for your ditzy shopkeeper!
Bronwyn O’Neill